Tonight tonight i feel my heart breaking all over again

Here's some poems that have nothing to do with what i;m really going to tell you.

                                What of it?

You know this world we live in, with its problems and its ways? You know how the dollar, doesn’t go a long way? You know how girls are getting Prego at six or seventeen, it doesn’t mean I’ll be wreak less, to where that ends up being me.

You know this ordeal called homosexuals? There’s not anything wrong with these people and their souls. They’re just a little different, it doesn’t change who they are and it doesn’t mean you have to go hit them with your car.

You know the things called a race? Yeah, there is one of every kind, Asian Hispanic, Black or white, it doesn’t matter they still have a mind.

You know this thing called time? Yeah, well there’s little of it, but all these things you call problems all I can say is, ‘Yeah? What of it?’ It doesn’t matter if you’re Prego, or if you like your own sex, it doesn’t matter if you’re Asian, Hispanic, Black or white, we all have colors too.

And if you talk smack on us, I’ll say ‘Yeah, why does it matter so much to you?’

What of it?

Moonlit dance

Take this chance, hold my hand, this is it, what I’ve been waiting for.

Into the night, out by the lake, the fireflies are all outside our back door.

Come with me, I’ll get you to see, who I really want to be.

Around you, I feel free, like you complete me.

My missing piece, the one I need, Just please take a chance on me.

I promise you, that I’ll be exactly the person you want me to be.

I’ll hold you fragile, in my hands, not matter what it takes to make amends.

You’re so free, like I want to be, you teach me, how to let go of petty things. Please flash me that smile and take my hand.

So we can make it final, by a moonlit dance.

So Forbidden

 Be quiet, love, they’re on our tail, the closer they get, the more we fail.

We can’t be seen, in public, because showing affection is apparently ‘demonic’.

Just say ‘yes’ you already are here. Take my hand and we’ll flee the streets.

They can’t find us, no not where we’re going.

We’re so forbidden, and no one knows it.

Staring

I can’t seem to stop staring because you’re just so beautiful. I want you to sit by me so I can tell you what it is I want you to know.

You make me smile as if I was a child. You make me laugh, I haven’t laughed in a while. When I look at you, you make my heart flutter.

Pardon me, but your eyes are so soothing, they make me relax.

I can’t taste your lips nut I’m sure they’d put me at ease.

You’re just so beautiful, please take my hand, and maybe then, you’ll understand…

Why I can’t stop staring.

So, Joy and I have decided to completely just stop. Which will either held us or hurt us both. Because she’s a big part of my life right now. BUT!

Here’s what happened.

She’ll probably be mad at me for doing’ this cuz Mags didn’t know, but on Monday, Joy and I had decided to be touchy feely bodies. And Tuesday, I don’t think there was any big deal going on. Yesterday, she had told me she had started regretting her decision.

I laughed because well, obviously, it was coming. And I saw it. So today, Thursday, a lot of really important things took place.

1.      Apparently she called me a bitch, didn’t shock me.

2.       She told me the truth.

3.       I told her something along the lines of what I was thinking past my tears, which I’m still trying to fight.

4.      And my last sentence, a VERY big sentence that means a lot to me And Joy, was

‘Still friend’s right?’

I’m done trying to force her into things, I’ve done that enough. This’ll be a big regret for me, because I was at her mercy.

And I send her an email saying ‘So, it’s up to you, yes or no?’

Her reply: No.

Believe me, I saw this coming. I’ve been thinking and crying about this since school ended today.

I’ve lost her.

I just gave up. The last thing I wanted to do I did. I hurt her, we fought, and we no longer want to speak to each other daily.

So I’m stuck with these thoughts haunting everything I do.

I’m really hopping she feels the same way. There’s no way I’ll last like this.

And this is really a confession to her saying in the best way I can…

I’m so incredibly sorry.

I’ve lost her.

Now, a happier subject,

I warned Bateman that all my attention will be going to her and my obsession as well, she laughed and said okay.

God I love her laugh <3 her smile too <3 and she has amazing eyes <3 a brilliant color of green I might add <3 Love yah hun :)

Goodnight my lovelies, lets see if i can stop crying.